Vote For, You Know, the Thing

 

OPINION — Mike Rowe, the guy that did the Dirty Jobs show, often receives angry letters from people who have misunderstood something he’s said. Mike is astute and literate, and has a talent for succinctly summing up a situation far better than most, but that doesn’t seem to help. Some folks are determined to get the wrong impression, and if you look hard enough for something at which to take offense, you’ll find it, even when it’s not there.

This often happens to me, too. I recently exchanged emails with a reader who frankly should not be reading my columns, since they evidently raise his blood pressure. Hard to believe, I know, since I’m the epitome of tact and diplomacy. Still, the guy was angry with me. He’d already written a rude and disparaging letter to the editor of the Mason County News about me, even though they don’t even run my column anymore. But that act failed to cool his temper, so he saw fit to write and tell me he doesn’t like me, mainly because I’m a Trump supporter. Which was news to me.

The incident reminded me of something Mark Twain wrote once. He said, ‘In my column last week I said this woman was the ugliest woman I’ve ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and wish to retract my previous statement.’

My impression is that the president, regardless of political party affiliation, is basically a mule. His job (or hers, should a woman be elected) is to pull the plow, and that’s it. And my job is to make fun of the president when they do something silly, which they all do, sooner or later. But I avoid politics in this column most of the time, because of people like my recent whiner, whose name I won’t mention, because of the tact thing.

And for the record, I don’t support Trump, or any other politician. I try to acknowledge when they do something good, and I complain when they do something I don’t like, and that’s about it. I think Johnny Carson nailed it when he was asked why he didn’t address politics. He said that wasn’t his job, and it’s not mine, either. Not in this column, anyway.

But the reader, we’ll call him Candy, was adamant that I support Trump. Even when I pointed out that I’ve never endorsed a particular politician, for any office, because I don’t trust any of them, he still insisted that I’m a Trump supporter. And for the record, I was lying. I did, at one time, voice support for Jerry Patterson, when he ran for Texas Lt. Governor. But I had forgotten about that, so I should get a pass.

But I think Candy was mostly upset, not at me, but at the Democrat party, because they nominated Joe Biden to run against Trump this year. I think a lot of the folks who want Trump to lose, at any cost, are unhappy about that. And I want to state publicly that I had nothing to do with it. If you’re bummed about the Biden-Harris ticket, don’t blame me. I was pulling for Bernie.

But that would’ve been unfortunate, because Biden has turned out to be far more entertaining. Bernie isn’t as upbeat as Biden, and I don’t blame him. The Democrats stole his slot four years ago and gave it to Hillary, although Bernie had a real shot at beating Trump. If I were Bernie I’d be chapped, too. And if Bernie were running this year, he’d probably win. But the Dems don’t like Bernie, because he’s right sometimes. They hate that.

So they’re stuck with Joe, bless his heart. Poor Joe, who can’t keep his hands off little girls, and has no idea why people think he should. He can’t seem to complete a coherent sentence. He can’t answer a question without reading from a teleprompter. He can’t keep from calling people ‘fat,’ or ‘dog-faced pony soldier.’ I still have no idea what that means. Joe can’t remember the pledge of allegiance, or the first line of the Declaration of Independence, which is the easiest one, the only line anyone really knows. Poor Joe. I love him. No one has made me laugh so hard, and Bill Clinton tried to imply the meaning of the word ‘is’ could be open to interpretation.

Honestly, I don’t like Trump as a person, and I can’t imagine how anyone could. I think he’s made some mistakes as president, but all presidents make mistakes, and Trump has also done a lot of really good things. He’s the only U.S. president, ever, to be nominated for two Nobel Peace Prizes in one week. Overall I think he’s done a lot more good than harm, and I can’t say that about many presidents. And I guarantee someone will be offended by this column, I just hope it’s not Bernie. He’s got enough problems to worry about.

My job is not to tell you who to vote for. I don’t know enough to do that, and even if I did, I doubt anyone would listen. But if anyone actually wants my advice, I’d recommend you vote for the candidate who is least likely to show up at a press conference with no pants on.

Because you need pants to pull the plow . . .

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Comments

It’s true! Deep within the demo libs’ dark little hearts, they don’t want the chaos to end. If the violence were to stop tomorrow and coronavirus magically disappear, it would be the worst thing that could possibly happen to them.

Love that win at any cost that you attempt to attribute to democrats. You need to do some serious deep thinking and also scrutinize the orange tax cheat. A lot of repubs are okay with the orange tax cheats fraud, perhaps because they are tax cheats as well. You know that violence stopping and a vaccine for covid-19 you mention would be just so great. there would be no reason to release the orange tax cheat and his crime family. Trump and his tax cheating are going to drag him down along with his crime family. You can write that down.

After what happened to Sanders (twice), and going by who ended up being the nominees, one can’t help but think that the democrat establishment manipulates the process when it comes to choosing their candidate. I do think this time it was Bernie’s choice...which means he either got paid, or was promised key aspects of his socialist agenda would be implemented.

I had no idea that you were big on Sanders, do you support his entire agenda like a real Bernie supporter? Biden is plenty smart , he is not the one with covid-19 or the Chinese virus, democratic hoax or what ever labels the Corona virus gets from the know nothings. The government must continue to function and with Trump and Pence both in isolation and or quarantine then Nancy will have to take over the presidency.

Trumps tax returns have been under “continuous investigation” since 2002. So either there’s nothing there, or the IRS is incompetent take your pick. Bottom line Trump is not legally obligated to release his tax returns publicly.
Which begs the question...where did this so-called information come from would it not be considered classified information? And why now just days before an election? I know the answer how about you?

3 years of fake impeachment, abuse of the FISA court, dems paying for a 'russian' dossier, every kind of slander in the world and all you got is Trump didn't pay much in taxes? Wow, no wonder ya'll selected Biden. You don't have three brain cells to rub together and he accurately represents your Party! Just kidding. I know some very smart dems, but if after three years plus of Trump being Trump that is all you have to complain about then surely you can see why it is that we support Trump. He may be a jerk but at least he actually loves this country and not the one you and your comrades are trying to create.

spineless twat.
It's obvious you're only interested in what excites the base (mud wrestling, phase alphas, meme arguments) regardless the cost and erosion of the office. You could be a champion and dare say, a leader, and demand someone better to represent the conservative platform, but you're weak.
Later beta

It was no fake impeachment, it was genuine and Trump is impeached and he would have been convicted and thrown out of office had the GOP sinate allowed witnesses. Thee part that was fake was the GOP led trial.

That was no debate is was more like a trailer park scrap. The orange buffoon interrupted Biden 73 times while spewing his stupid and covid-19 germs in the room. Poor Chris Wallace must have felt like he was hosting a Jerry Springer episode.

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